Are you in need of some you time? Valentine’s day is over and as much as I appreciate reading about tips and tricks on how to best bring out the romance in your relationship with that special someone. I would like to celebrate the relationship you have with yourself, all year, every day. It’s the single most important relationship you’ll ever have. The key to any successful relationship starts with some you time. If you don’t make yourself the number one priority, no one else will either.
Since I’m not only a food blogger but also a health coach every Wednesday you’ll find a blog post about health and personal development. It’s the wellness Wednesday’s health coaching tips. First out was a post on how to best keep your New Year’s resolutions.
I use to run around trying to make room for everyone else, but me. I needed to see this person, I needed to go to this event, my kids needed me. Until there was nothing left for me. Now, I have “you time” on my calendar.
1. Make room for some you time
This was an important one for me and unfortunately, I learned this one the hard way. I’m a very social person and I love doing things that are fun to me. But there was never time for me. Just me. If you burn the candle at both ends, it’ll burn quickly. Without me time, there’s never time for self-reflection. Which is vital for growth. “When I know better, I do better.” This simply does not happen if there’s no room or time for some “you time”.
As mentioned my calendar has “you time”, every week. When I do things for myself by myself. I reflect on things and try to see things from a different perspective. It’s also the time when I decide on what works and what doesn’t.
This falls a little bit under the same category as alone time, however, it’s more specific. I used to never be able to sit still and be surrounded by, well, silence. But ever since I forgot where I parked my car in a huge parking garage, like for real forgot. (I had to go around every floor until I found my car. I couldn’t remember.) I knew it was time to wind down.
A former colleague of mine recommended the app headspace to me and it had been on my phone ever since. It was time to use it. So basically the app starts with the basics of meditation. I love his voice, it’s very calming.
I won’t lie to you, it was hard and I questioned why I needed this. But then as time went on, I started to like it, a lot. And now I need it. It has shifted the way I think. How I can think conscious thoughts. Obviously, you don’t need an app to meditate, but it has helped me tremendously. In the moments of meditation, I’m only allowed to practice self-love. There’s no failure.
3. Learn something new
One of the best things I know is to read. When I read something happens to me. Something wonderful. I get excited and it’s like butterflies in my stomach when I get to read well-written books. I completely wind down on getting lost in another world. Now, I love to learn new things, so my favourite books are either factual books. Or I love getting lost in make-believe worlds, such as Harry Potter.
If you don’t like to read, then there are brilliant podcasts or audiobooks. The point is to take this you time and learn something new as often as you can. Learning something new is beneficial to the brain as well. Since it causes the brain to build connections between neurons. Replacing some of those we lose over time.
4. Stop trying to please everyone
Just stop. Period. You will not succeed. Turn this one around. Is there a way for everyone to please you? So then why on earth would this possible for you? I don’t care if you are a nice person. Most people consider themselves being nice. However, this makes you do a lot of things that are not good for anyone. Least of all for you. And all this time you are trying to figure out what others want. You could be spending on some serious “you time” and figure out what you want. Being conscious and intentional with your time frees up a lot of unnecessary energy wasted on meaningless things.
5. Start journaling
In whatever form that works for you. If you are dear diary type do that. If you are more like me, that journaling doesn’t come that naturally for you. Then just write down 3 things you are thankful for that day and three things you would like to do differently. There is something very powerful happening when you put words pen to paper. This also allows you to stop and reflect on the everyday moments of your life. It will also allow you to see patterns that maybe you want to change or do differently.
Expressing gratitude on a daily basis will over time change the way you see yourself and again help you to live more intentionally. When you start your day with intent you will no longer dwell unnecessarily on things that don’t matter as much. Which will over time lead you to more you time.